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Mar. 10th, 2005 @ 08:29 pm
Holy crap my sister was just admitted to CARNAGIE MELON for their graduate design program!!! :))))))

and I made a kickas Miso soup with egg noodles and edemame!!!!


damn i wanna go to Carnegie Melon.

May. 17th, 2004 @ 09:10 am
Alright if you havent done so...add

May. 15th, 2004 @ 01:22 pm
Alright I think I got everyone pegged.....

May. 14th, 2004 @ 09:15 am
Well..this journal is closing.. If you havent noticed, Ive reincarnated myself, and if you havent been added and would like to.. ask.


this makes me happy.... May. 14th, 2004 @ 08:55 am
Love almost passed J-1 by. At 5 years of age and 52 pounds, he’s reaching the end of the line for his species, the largest octopus in the world. J-1 is in a period of decline that occurs before an octopus dies. His skin is eroding. His suckers have divots.

“He’s not as strong as he used to be,” said aquarist Deanna Trobaugh.

With so little time left, J-1, who was collected on a beach near Seldovia in 1999 when he was about the size of a quarter, wasn’t going to let the sweet Aurora slip through his eight arms.

Aurora sank to the bottom when aquarium staff put her into J-1’s 3,600-gallon exhibit tank and promptly made the first move, reaching out to touch J-1 before retreating to her corner. But J-1 was soon in hot pursuit.

“They both were gripping the back wall of the tank. He just about covered her completely,” Hocking said.

The two remained intertwined for about eight hours. It’s possible that during that time he passed his sperm packet to her, Hocking said. When they separated, J-1 flashed some colors, turning almost white and then dark red.

“It looks like instinct took over during that encounter and they did what they were supposed to do,” Hocking said.

If Aurora did accept J-1’s spermatophores, she will produce 60,000 to 100,000 eggs. If with many, many children, Aurora — who was about the size of a grapefruit when she was found in 2002 living inside an old tire in front of the SeaLife Center — will stop eating while she tends her eggs. She will then weaken and die — a fate that J-1 also seems soon to meet.

“The goal for this was to let him lead a full life,” Hocking said.
Other entries
» (No Subject)
Brendan and I rode from Clark and Irving Park to Soldier Field, to Roosevelt and Wabash and took the red line home with a car full of cracked out homeless people... i really have never felt so terrible as when i saw this one guy or girl stand up from sleeping in his chair, stomach inflated and bones poking through.. he or she.. you couldnt tell the difference, was in a really bad state... put on his shoes and walked out.. i wonder what was wrong... i wonder what will happen to him ..

anyway...we got in some good BMXin.. I wanna learn, hell I can take entire steps after tonight hahahaha... it was fun tho, hadnt done it a year.. and B and rode through and reminiced about all our little adventures.. like driving back from wisconsin a couple years ago as the sun rode up and he was passed out in the back with Caitlyn and Nathan and I sang christmas carols... or when we ended up in a back of a van with a 9 month pregnant raver eating special muffins... or our little lunch meetings when he lived in Bridgeport.. and lots of others i forgot i had until we got into our little conversation. Im so happy to have had a friend like this.
I almost forgot I had him, but we've had alot of good memories... standing in the middle of North Ave, at Central in the ghetto at 4 am with wackalakabeside and the techno twins trying to hail a cap (there are NO cabs in the ghetto silly boot at least not at 4 am.. haha)

There are some interesting hookers in my neighborhood. One stuck out her ass at me and the other was dressed like a school girl carrying a fucking Lacross stick

Im a livejournal crack addict. How can I delete this? hahaha.. must rethink.
Seems like when I have good times with good friends that can have fun and understand me because we have been friends for such a long time... i find a parking spot right in front of my building...

someone's watching out for me..
even if it is the bangas..

» (No Subject)
I will backup tonight. I will delete this journal tonight. I have cleared off myspace, friendster and AIM. I am thinking about having a blog elsewhere or beginning anew and only adding people I know in person. I will eventually have my own site up with portfolio, blog etc. but until then if someone wants to know whats up in my life they can call me.
» (No Subject)
Im letting everything go. What happens happens, but I am certainly done putting out effort.
» (No Subject)
next semester:

Professional Practice I
2 Credit Hours
Legal and ethical considerations in architectural practice; operation and management guidelines. Overview of the history of professional architectural practice.

Architectural Structures II
4 Credit Hours
Design of structural steel and wood building elements including tension members, compression members, beams, bearing plates, bolted connections, and welded connections

Urban Ecologies and Infrastructures
3-4 Credit Hours
Introduction to dynamic relationship of ecology and infrastructure in the context of contemporary urban landscape. Impact of environmental conditions on construction of sites, buildings, cities, and regions. Impact of construction of sites, buildings, cities, and regions on environmental conditions.

Advanced Architectural Design I: Digital Media
8 Credit Hours
Design of multiple or complex building types with an emphasis on the theoretical, technical, societal and economic considerations relating to Digital Media.
» Memories
This is the family I havent seen in 13 years. My aunt got into photography and bought a digital camera and computer. Pictures.. they bring back so many memories before I was brough over here, and they make me so extremely happy, connected back to where I come from, to my family whose little memories I have to Ive clung on to... anyway... this has just made my day 100 times better....

Snails. We used to gather buckets of.. race them on the kitchen windows....

Birch trees are my favorite, they always remind me of home, their texture, the sound
their leaves make...

Hounddogs! :) Look at that background, rolling valleys...

lookinglassCollapse )

» Morning Thoughts...
--- Please please dont ever let me get as beaten, down, frumpy and uninteresting as all the slaves (corporate sharecroppers) on the busses to work in the morning, all the frazzled women with unkept hair, loose mismatched clothes and faded unhappy eyes, all the crinkled asthmatic men, sweating from anticipation and pressure... if fate is destiny i certainly hope im not destined for such an end.

--- Listening to breakbeats in the morning puts me in a very very good mood and gets my adrenaline running.

--- I really enjoy waking up in the morning and making hot tea for myself.

--- Cooking (like my sister) is hobby I am certainly looking forward to acquiring.

--- There are several people I can see that I would not ever want out of my life regarless, (new and old friends made) and good conversation with them the previous night reinstates in me that Im not so crazy as I think I am, and that there is more feeling left in me that I anticipated (that adds to the good morning mood)

--- Craving Jamba Juice in the morning feels fabulous. I need to consume more fruit and less ramen. :-p
» (No Subject)
this guys whos been wantin to take me out made me a dfilm:


and i dont like the ending.. and the answer still stands! no!
» (No Subject)
oh yes its so good to be caught up on bills and have money left over.... and be debtless for a minute. yeeessss.... its almost orgasmic the release of tension i feel... this tax cut sure didnt benefit me in the whole scope of things... but it sure got to my mailbox at the right damn time.......ahhhhh....
» (No Subject)
I am really diggin this lineup :

At the press conference held today part of the line-up of the Movement festival was announced. We will keep track of any changes, but in the meantime read on for the line-up!!

Alden Tyrell live
Amp Fiddler live
Barbara Preisinger
Biological Live
Camp Amp DJs
Claude Young
Cloud 9
Danny Krivit
Derek Plaslaiko
DJ Cosmo
DJ Genesis live
DJ Nova
Duplex Live
Ellen Allien!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fat Freddy's Drop
Francois K!!!!!!!!!!!
Garth Trinidad
Goldfinger (AML)
Greg Mudge
Groove Junkies
Heiroglyphic Being
Highfish Jeannie Hopper
Joris Voorn live
Kai Alce
Kelvin Larkin
Kenny Larkin
Kevin Reynolds
Kevin Saunderson
Louis Haiman
Madlib and PBW ft Jay Dee!!!!!!!!!
Malik Alston Painted Pictures
Marques Wyatt!!!!!!!!
Mike Geiger
Mike Grant
Mike Huckaby
Novamen Live
Osunlade Live!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Red Nose Distrikt
Reel People
Remy Rockid (DMC Champion)
Ron Trent
Sean Deason
Stacey Pullen!!!!!!!!
Tortured Soul Live
» Living Issues
I would really like to have my upcoming living situation figured out. Although my roomate and I are fine with living with each other another year, what space, where and even IF we will continue living with each other is up on the air. What bothers me is that I dont even have a concrete alternate, and although Id like to stay where I am at most people would not want to live in that area... cos its not trendy enough :-p. Ideally I would live alone but that is not feasable. Building my own spacial sanctuary with privacy and loftiness is critical so until I find some sort of solution I will be at a loss for a piece of mind...
» Fate Wills Not
Yesturday's therapy left me in a very muddled place. Good thing. Bad thing.

I spend the evening talking with Touissant, who dragged me out of my apartment and being a sleepy head and showed me the glamerous incarnation of his website: www.besigned.com its not up yet but its done and he showed me the entire tree, its really a great idea, and its already begun working. We always have really honest conversations and he listens well which I strongly appreciate. I also admire that he is manifesting his dreams. He goes to school during the day, works as a communications engineer (?) during the night and manages to have a side project completeled and ready for launch and another one just beginning. I really enjoy having people around me that are doing something, rather then just settleing for the lust of 20-something. Granted it takes time to get there, and I am not there myself.. but indeed it is really inspirational.

We are going fishing in 2 weeks.

Today I was supposed to have a dinner with Jake. We were originally planning it for past Saturday and moved it to today. Yet it looks like fate just doesnt not will it, since I was just informed that I have to go to a quarterly meeting/dinner at Red Light with my company and owner. Its not mandatory that I go but it does look bad.. and right now I dont want to worry about my job.. so plans for a 5 o'clock meal must be scrapped and I must attend *sigh*

This week I have to make plans for Tzu Sing and Mykal, Jasmine and Robyn as well. Saturday I already have planned with Zmin, Crystal and Sara and Friday is Will's housewarming. Thursday I have the option of going to Soundbar but instead I think I will try and see Tzu Sing and hang out. That way all my social responsibilies will be covered. I know I need time for myself in between all this, and I do have that but I am really trying to work on being a more dependable friend and the only way I can see myself becoming stronger in that is to follow through on these sorts of "responsibilies" (although friendship as a responsibility almost makes me queasy) anyway... back to tha grind...
» Money Wooaaaa
Racking up so many hundreds of dollars in overdue payments really worries me - especially since I have no credit card and no loans and I still cant seem to manage my fincances. I want to say to myself and excuse it with school and how I needed to work less etc. but the truth is I should have saved money when I had it instead of spending it on frivulous things that I dont even have. I mean, if Im going to be broke, id rather be broke and say have eames or corb chairs or a really nice piece of furniture or art worth something then some clothes or makeup and shit like that.. but I tend to live minimally in terms on acquiring things yet somehow all the money I made last year has turned into nothing.
» homocide harlem
Yeah.... Harlem streets stay flooded in white powder
Like those mother fuckers runnin' away from the twin towers
Gun shots rock the earth like a meteor shower
Bowling For Columbine, fair, giving the media power
Innocence devoured like a chicken spot snack box
Government cocain cooked into ghetto crack rock
Corrupt cops false testimony at your arraignment
Check to check, constant struggle to make the payments
Working your whole life wondering where the day went
The subway stays pakced like a multi-cultural slave ship
It's rush hour, 2:30 to 8, non stoppin'
And people coming home after corporate share croppin
And fuck flossin, mothers are trying to feed children
But gentrification is kicking them out of their building
A generation of babies born without health care
Families homeless, thrown the fuck off of the welfare

It's like Cambodia the killing fields uptown
We live in distress and hang the flag upside down
The sound of conservative politicians on television
People in the hood are blind so they tell us to listen
They vote for us to go to war instantly
But none of their kids serving the infantry
The odds are stacked against us like a casino
Think about it, most of the army is black and latino
And if you can't acknowledge the reality of my words
You just another stupid mother fucker out on the curb
Trying to escape from the ghetto with your ignorant ways
But you can't read history at an illiterate stage
And you can't raise a family on minimum wage
Why the fuck you think most of us are locked in a cage
I give niggaz the truth, cause they pride is indigent
You better off rich and guilty than poor and innocent
But I'm sick of feeling impotent watching the world burn
In the era of apocalypse waiting my turn
I'm a Harlem nigga that's concerned with the future
And if your in my way it'd be an honor to shoot ya
Up root ya with the evil that grows in my people
Making them deceitful, cannibalistic and lethal
But I see through the mentality implanted in us
And I educate my fam about who we should trust

» (No Subject)
Today is anticipatory.
Half days work - afternoon therapy sessions
Time to clean out studio, document the work
apply for tuition wavers, register for next year.
I feel so downtrodden, slow.. I must make something happen soon.

Last nite, scopped Matty from Solstice.
Ate at Cooba, saw Denis, Groo, Audra. Benny greeted me with a sincere hug and kiss on the cheek, amusing granted I dont know him well, am suprised he remembered me, and he came with Audra.. whose parking spot I stole.. ironically... she steals my boyfriend.. I steal her parking spot.. ahh haa.ha.

Its not even painful anymore as much as it is numbing. I feel like I have lost all belief I had left in support and possibility of love and consideration. Plainly said I dont care...about anything but myself. And when I say myself, it is in the licking my own wounds sortof way, trying to figure out what the hell it is im going to do now that i feel so displaced from my context. Its very odd to have someone express an interest in you, and deem you inspirational to their own cause.. when you yourself feel inspirationaless.

I went out with Mykal for a second time on Saturday. I am having trouble trusting the ease of our conversation and the way our opionions align, I am distrustful not because of him but of myself that what he says is too much in agreement.. I am distrustful that he sees in me something that really isnt there, I am distrustful of his attention... although on the other hand he reminds me of Chris so incredibly much, only different, but still very intelligent and inuative in that way and that is incredibly comforting at some level.... anyway, I dont know where this is going.. I have no idea why I am even going on these little dates with anyone.. it makes me feel guilty because I feel like I cant offer anything and I dont want to mislead/hurt anyone...

Tomorrow Im supposed to have dinner with Jake. I dont know how I feel about that.. I have no expectations at all.. initially I did but following this weekend, I opt to choose to expect dissapointment more than content...

Lastly, I feel awkward feeling obligated to maintain my responsibilities as a friend. Right now at this point I would love nothing more then to pick up and move away, start somehwere where no one knowns me and maintain my solitude. New York.. L.A... somewhere not here.

Oh and I might not go to Detroit. I am in a terrible financial rut. If my tax return does not come soon, my phone and gas and internet will be shutting off... I will be back on my feet as of the 25th if the tax return comes.. if it doesnt, on the 25th ill be able to get all my debt off my back but that will leave me with nothing for detroit...

at this point, just like with everything else it doesnt seem as important anymore then just escaping from the social context..
» Mother's day
I am really unhappy with this livejournal. I want to have up my own page with all my things, my portfolio, my resume, photos, everything .. I want it to grow. this isnt growing this is standing on a soapbox in an empty square talking to myself. ugh. so today Im spending on tutorials and refreshers for Dreamweaver and Fireworks...

This weekend has been one giant dissapointment of myself. It is not external it is indeed my own fault and making. Ive managed to becoming the cog of a big mess. That aside I went out with what seems to be a perfectly happy and balanced invidividual, we talked well, we got along well, we clicked well... and for some reason I cannot phahtom I am trying to find something incredibly wrong with who he is.. why am I sabotaging something that hasnt even begun? - My sister says.. its about time for me to have someone normal around ... haha This was the kicker tho... my sister and I planned out mother's day brunch. I chose the restaurant, and the time and my family came to my place and we went from here... the place is Room 12 btw.. its really too bad Jake and I never got a chance to check it out together cos its pretty damn awesome... anyway, we have brunch, my mom is of course, lecturing us.. i am being incredibly and surprisingly civil... we walk outside, get in the car and she goes "thank you agatha for today" and im like what do you mean thank you agatha.. she says cos only aggie remembered blah blah blah...so i got out of the fucking car and walked my ass home from Wabash and Roosevelt to Pilsen. Ill be fucking damned that I will be so undermined for my effort to better my relationship with someone who I dont even like too much....

all this crap just makes me miss Jake more and more...
» on friendships and aquaintances...
stability. honesty. and individuality are certainly lost character traits.
i belong to no one, and this is why I am one. I dont like partaking in social donut escapades.
» (No Subject)
This is all so very unneccesary.
» (No Subject)
Um. So I had this lunch date with a guy who works nearby. He went to Columbia for music and works as a creative director something or other.. he produces (lucid tracks really good stuff) runs his own recording studio on the side and makes t-shirt graphics for sale too.. we ate at this thai restaurant midway between our jobs... it actually went really well.. hes talkative, intelligent, really sweet, complementary to my style of course, and really cute.. we really talked more than we could eat and he is so open... we have very similar circumstances too, both getting out of a relationship about 2 months ago.. haha... it was very enjoyable...next round, drinks on me.... so can you find whats wrong with the picture?
» (No Subject)

hah! dont even dare speculate if Im gonna be there.....
» fill me OUT.
1. I ____ Paulina.
2. Paulina is ____.
3. If I were alone in a room with Paulina, I would _______.
4. I think Paulina should _____.
5. Paulina needs ______.
6. I want to ____________ Paulina.
7. Someday Paulina will ________.
8. Paulina reminds me of _______.
9. Without Paulina _______.
10. Memories of Paulina are ________.
11. Paulina can be __________.
12. __________ is how I describe meeting Paulina.
13. The worst thing about Paulina is _________.
14. The best thing about Paulina is _________.
15. I am ________ with Paulina.

My urban plannin professor was so pleased with my institutions exercise that he recommend I take my thesis and do independant research since he is adamant that it is a topic that no one has yet discussed and it has enormous potential for publication.... wouldnt it be great to be published before becoming a dinosaur?
» Die Ende...

this is the end of my semester as so eloquently shot by one miss claire... involved alot of drinking...

+review in the am with full spread sushi from Maniwa, Wine.. the works
+lunching Falafel and park walks with Matty-kins
+drink drink drink @ Dugans with studio mates and professors, Sarah=wasted!!
+Rodan & Silver Cloud with Rupert and Claire and Sam
+Ran into Racheal my best friend from fresh. yr high school... just WOW.

hungover today.. but im glad to be back in my own skin.

» Architects = Alcoholics

+24 oz. white hen amaretto coffe
+24 oz. coca cola
+1 red bull
+salsa & chips
+1 litre water
+20 more hours of work left
+28 hours till review

» (No Subject)
you know whats fucked up.. i go out of my way of avoiding colliding into his orbit so it can be easier for the both of us. then these email exchanges happen like once every two weeks that get really vivid and its really hard for me to keep my walls up. i mean, the truth is i still have feelings for him and i probabbly will for a long time and nothing will circumvent that but what i am doing on the exterior is fighting off any more tremors to shake em up because im trying to settle them.. trying to have one fucking day that im not riding a mind fuck rollercoaster..i know i may not be so graceful when talking about him or tactful still but its a fucking COPING mechanism... i dont know how else to really cope with it without trying to vocalize somehow the bitterness and all that crap that I still feel from the fallout.... fuckin A. why cant he just validate my feelings why must he get pissed because of that or this or something else... why does he do that right when im trying to feel calm and stirs everything up again because he knows i care because he knows that i would never try and do him any real damage...
» (No Subject)
no i dont want to be confused... honestly as cliche as this sounds, i will never make the mistake from which ive learnerd from my relationship with jake. i cannot ever allow myself to succumb to another assuming that the other is on the same page, willing to compromise willing to meet half way there.. as young and naive as that forceful ambition may be right now it stands.. im confused to hell.. im hurting and hurting and it doesnt go away. it wont go away... wtf. why cant i just flip a switch...and be normal and normally relate to people... fuck all this caution to the wind... that is if you can stand the socialmess.. i cant.. id rather withdraw.

all day today hes been runnin through my head, no doubt planted by my moms questions.. no doubt getoutgetoutgetout
» oh such friendly reminders!
"just a friendly reminder that your ex(i think) is a fucking poser and tell him joshua magnus said so."
» (No Subject)
I really hope you get what you deserve.
» some thoughts..
the one spinny chromy wheel on a car is the equivalent of the one pant leg of sweat pants rolled up

as much as I love my parents and am glad that they are involved in my life, and although this morning was pleasurable... we went to immigration and picked up the new car.. Honda Pilot... I really think Im going to implode if Id have to sit through another car trip of my mom analyzing my love life, or lack thereof and my dad giving me drivining instructions... hah.

it feels complete, this incompleteness...
» (No Subject)
The city she is deserted, youth agglomorated in college town, everyone goes away.. goes on and away.
There is no this, nor that not the other.. it never will be although it once was, felt again. Sad really
because nothing compares.... rewind please.
» (No Subject)
Sarah's attitude is irking me today. My body is really sore cos I didnt sleep well last nite.. and suddently I have found myself in a really amusing situation which has some cockamany (ilovethatword) lesson entangled in it which I can see but dont want to grasp. Whatsup fickle?
» (No Subject)
$2.00 guinesses and pool..... :)
» (No Subject)
I have been in school since 8 am this morning... the plans are almost complete.. Sarah is building our fabulously kitchish model out of chip/vinyl/burlap. Once the plans are done I work on the sections and the 3d rendering simultaneously, followed by several.. about 10 - 11x17 drawings from different vantage points... so far so good, Im pretty pleased as well as exhuasted because from now until Tuesday May 4th, I will be in school day and night.. all my bills will be late once again... but it doesnt really bother me much right now. The adrenaline is flowing with the anticipation of that feeling you get when you are done after your review and everything is wrapped up and final and done... it is such an accomplished emotion.... i cant wait for this to be over :) and then we will all hit the bar as a studio, get obliterated on a tuesday nite... sleep all day wednesday and persue the next 3 months of utter freedom.yay :)
» (No Subject)
Thumbsup to group therapy.
» (No Subject)
I am in a really really weird mood right now.. its not a coincidence. I want to go eat Ethiopian or cuban at these two spots I know.. then go shopping, get some wine... come back here... have a drink.. have a smoke... put on a movie, lay back relax... share kisses and indulge away... faaawwk.. then wake up and have brunch at room 12. *perfect*
» (No Subject)
today was a better day. tomorrow I go in gear.. but tonight was a night for movies and cuddling and music listening / wine indulgence... that would obviously imply a need for.. a friend. haha.. one more week to go!
» (No Subject)
you know after all day bustin my ass runnin around chicago looking for a variety of papers and vinyl for this model and then sitting in studio with cockyface carson and his spineless minion "jammin" out to dave matthews in their matching outfits... fuckers... youd think some sort of concious coincidence would allow me to for a change.. find a fucking parking spot in this neighborhood....

» (No Subject)
Instead of working on my project, I took 3 hours of my day to finish off the 2 disk compilation for one Kenny Im proud. If anyone wants a copy of my Breakdown Im willing to oblige.. its a personal compilation but I know that when I have heard my friends' mixes and compilations they made by feelin usually its the best relevant music out there.. anyway, if anyone wants a copy.. let me know.

Sarah and I have this really bad tension between us right now. We are both so headstrong and alike in that sense...However when I ask her to explain something to me, she gets all agitated and tells me I talk to her like shes 5. I dont do that because she is five, I do that because I need things explained to me like I am 5 sometimes... haha.. simple. I have a hard time comprehending reference points or implications in english.. no matter how well I understand this language there are still lapses in cognition and ration.. I wish people didnt take it so personally and took it for what it was.. so when I ask them a simple question its because I need to structure my thoughts for reception of a simple answer... its difficult to explain.... anyway it sucks because it just makes we want to retreat under a rock or something when someone reacts so roughly toward my attempt at being open and receiving... this too will pass.. people like sarah and I will certainly have clashes especially when we are so damn alike...
» (No Subject)
In fact the most important thing is whats actually going on here and now, right before your eyes, and questions about the beginning and end tell you nothing worth knowing...
» (No Subject)

getting it all out and getin on the same page with Matty just lifted this big fear of responsibility off my shoulder.. assumptions suck! livin in the moment.. now thats what i can flo with... ain nothin wrong with being buddies :-D i am in a no date state at the moment.. at least not dedicated ones, its reassuring to know that is a mutual perception.. and i come back. stronger, better, fasssssturrrrrr
» (No Subject)
...you little piece of shit...
» (No Subject)
So here is what Im thinking for this summer:

Mondays I would teach a class in the AM then do therapy in the afternoon... Tuesday through Friday I would work from 8:30 - 5:00 at SDI and Tuesday nights take a class at COD for Quark, Photoshop, Illustrator (or take it at some other school)... do that until mid August then go to China for the month of September...

My boss says I should either take a class somehwere and not teach.. or teach and not take a class.. Im looking at summer non credit or associate/internet classes from :

Art Institute

if you have any other suggestions for design/tech schools where i can pick up Flash and the like let me know

Best part is my boss said I can work part time.. which if all else fails I can do and just get another job part time at a bar or a store or at the Fresh makeup counter at Marshall Fields.....

options options! I just know I dont want to sit on my ass all summer... I want to see what my options are, what else I can do... this includes researching multimedia firms.. cos maybe I can go into a different work environement...young architectural or overall design companies.. so I can get started on taking over this bitch.. :)
» (No Subject)
Aside from teaching a class at Marwen this summer, Id really like to take a class or two in multimedia : Flash MX / Dreamweaver / Fireworks programming... and if I can Visual Basic... but Im looking around and beyond a crash course at New Horizons no one really offers a summer intensive course.... that cramps my style.. guess Id better buy a book! :-D
» (No Subject)
Im doing something good... www.marwen.org

That place basically saved my ass in high school.. And I T.A'd there for almost 3-4 years in college... might as well do that again this summer.. do something productive and change of pace :)
» (No Subject)
I am in a fabulous mood today.. dont know why... but I am. Maybe the clarification I received from Jake is exactly what I needed to have in order to find some structure to my wandering perspective. Our friendship is over. That doesnt mean we wont be friends sometime in the future.. aquaintances more like.. but the strong bond that existed is acknoledgably gone and that reiteration just helps me solidify alot of self realizations. Perhaps that is why I am in a good mood.... Also today has already been most productive, I am excited for the last 2 weeks of school, it stopped raining, and I got a call from Matty.. and invite to play pool with Rupert... plans with Jasmine on Friday... it just feels good to have options, to stop for a second and bask in the everchanging time life moment that brings in something fresh and although painfully pulls other things into the background...cyclically bring you back up as much as it had brought you down i am not afraid today. i am happy.
» (No Subject)
Love fades away .. time makes it go astray.. but still feel you to this day

» (No Subject)
All day at work today and they have no work for me. Im still getting paid thank goodness... I cracked today and wrote Jake's mom and email.. I really need some advice on sorting somethings out..her and I always talked like old girlfriends and hopefully she will offer some structuring advice to deal with the confusion ive been feeling lately. Jake hasnt responded to me though that is expected... I lost my best friend in the truest of ways.. and that makes me very very sad.

The project is going well.. look like I will have to take off work the entirety of next week to work on drawings.. Its okay at this point its like being in a trance and I like it.. aside from the Illmeasures thing on Friday I dont think I want or would be able to go out this weekend.. not that I mind, I need this time to wrap up school before I focus on what to do with myself come the freetime of summer..
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